What's a wedding like? One Wedding Photographer’s Perspective

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I know it's a semi-silly question to ask, but it’s also tough to answer in an easy and succinct way.

For new or aspiring wedding photographers, it’s a very important question to ask, especially if you haven’t attended many weddings.

Of course, you’re familiar with the basics (bride, groom, etc). I’m guessing you’re curious about the “other things.” Let’s start with this:

The wedding day is a special day filled with emotions - LOTS of emotions from many different people. Many of the people are attending the wedding as guests, some play an part in the wedding day and some play a very important part.

Everyone is important.

Of course, there's happiness and joy, that’s the primary emotion, but there can also be some sadness, uncertainty, sometimes anxiety and perhaps even fear.

I start with the emotional part because that’s the part new photographers often overlook and find out the hard way.

This day starts very early and usually ends late. This adds to some of the emotion because, by the end of the day, most folks are pretty pooped - both mentally and physically.

This is a day that's been planned for months and often longer.

This is a day that's been hoped for and anticipated for years.

This is a day that is expected to be perfect in every. single. way. *

A wedding day is a series of small events smooshed together into one big, amazing event. It’s like an amusement park. There are some big rides and some smaller rides. There’s food and entertainment along with costumed characters, dancing and revelry (a fancy word for partying). And it’s all under one big tent called, The Wedding Day!

And then there's you, the humble yet capable wedding photographer, right in the middle, trying to figure out ISO, f-stops and shutter speeds of every lighting situation (of which there are many) while attempting to find and capture that perfect shot at the perfect moment (of which there are also many).

Did I mention anxiety, yet?

There is a LOT going on for everyone, and for every one of those people, everything is important. Your job is to help make that happen…and take incredible photos.

Oh yes, you’re not JUST the wedding photographer. Your role is much more than that.

If you’ve read any previous issues, you’ve probably noticed a theme - This day is NOT about you.

The best thing you can do is make sure you're putting the needs and feelings of others first before you worry about yourself…and take incredible photos.

"Oh sure, that's easy for you to say! You don't have [insert your problem here] or you're not dealing with [insert your other concerns here]"

That's kind of the point here.

Of course, you have a life. You DO have things you're dealing with at this very moment. But ALSO, at this very moment, the couple, YOUR couple, is experiencing the biggest day of their life so far, and they hired you to preserve it with photos.

You MUST put those things aside and focus on the people and all the wonderfully crazy things they're going through on this day.

What's a wedding day like? It’s not just a day or even an event, it’s an experience.

If you’re genuinely interested in becoming a wedding photographer, my best advice is to attend a wedding or three, which you probably have already. But the next time you go to one, you need to LOOK at things differently. Look for all the small and special things that happen.

Watch people’s faces. See the laughter, tears, smiles, frowns, actions, and reactions - those are the things you should pay attention to because, as a wedding photographer, THOSE are the things you’ll be photographing.

Those are the moments that define the day and make every wedding day unique.

There's a reason I'm not talking about photography in this newsletter. Photography is awesome, but it’s also very technical. It's the easiest part to master when you're shooting a wedding.

In my very biased opinion, the craft of wedding photography comes from everything EXCEPT the photography - the people, the details, the relationships, the timing, the anticipation and the emotions.

Keeping up with everything outside of photography is the tough part...and the fun part.

When you master the photography AND the “everything else,” you'll do much more than make a living in wedding photography. You'll find a purpose for your photography.

For me, that's what a wedding is like.

*Expectations and reality are two very different things, as we all know. It’s not our job to judge what is and what is not possible. As a wedding photographer, it’s our job to try to make all all expectations a reality. You can debate the merits of these expectations after the wedding. Photographers call those discussions their “war stories.”

The "inner game of wedding photography” is what happens outside of the photography part. The photography is the sexy and technical part of weddings. The inner game is the part that keeps you IN business, and THIS is what I write about each week in this newsletter.

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If you're interested in becoming a wedding photographer but don't know where to start, I can help.

Shoot me an email at [email protected]