Are you Cool, Kitschy, or a Coot?

[Read Time < 7 min]

Your success or failure as a wedding photographer is largely about attitude - YOUR attitude towards your work, towards your couple, towards their family and friends, towards the other vendors and towards the enviable position you hold on a wedding day.

There are a LOT of people you have to interact with throughout the day, and your attitude is on full display for everyone to see and love...or not love so much.

Like it or not, your attitude is a direct reflection of your business, and it's your responsibility to make sure it's as favorable as it can be.

I've met my fair share of wedding photographers and seen them in action throughout the day. It might be a broad generalization, but I've broken down the attitudes/personalities of wedding photographers into three groups. Of course, there's a lot of gray area between these three, but I see three types:

The Cool, The Kitschy or The Coot.

I'll save you the suspense and tell you now, you should shoot for the attitude of The Cool Photographer. Why?

The Kitschy Photographer has trolled waaay too many bridal websites for "epic wedding photos" and is determined to stage the ultimate wedding portfolio for themselves, I mean for their couple.

From the bride looking down at her wedding ring with a loving smile and the last rays of sunlight kissing her hair while the groom is four feet away, gently out of focus...to the "epic" photo of the wedding dress hanging amidst the rows of birch trees adding the perfect amount of contrast to the immaculately staged winter scenery... there's almost nothing you can't stage.

But wait, there's more! Let's not forget the final embrace of the night, with our hero groom dipping his stunning bride, noses almost touching and eyes locked on each other, while the bevy of wedding guests waving their sparklers frame up the couple perfectly, everyone with a perfect smile.

I think you get it.

There are too many, dare I say, goofy staged shots like this that neglect to say anything about the wedding day or tell any kind of story.

I can envision the couple sitting with their teenage kids, looking at their wedding photos together and explaining why the couple had to take a helicopter to the top of Mt. Bedford for that "perfect" wedding photo.

"But what if that's my life's passion - taking unforgettable and unbelievable wedding photos." OK, I'm with you, that's a fair question. My fair answer is that IF (and that's a firm IF) your couple is down with that and IF that is their passion too, by all means, stage away.

BUT

If this is not your couple, please do not steal precious time from the bride and groom's wedding day to pad your portfolio. This is their only wedding day (hopefully), and there's more than enough opportunity to get a groovy shot of the couple in a loving embrace without having to release 50 turtledoves on cue.

The Coot isn't nearly as bad as the Kitschy. Unfortunately, they're just here for the paycheck, and if they can avoid talking to anyone on the wedding day, that's fine with them.

They’ve shot a lot of weddings, and perhaps at one point, they were kinda cool, but those days are gone, and that fire is just a warm pile of embers.

They might wear a photographer’s vest or some elaborate harness system so they can have every piece of gear on them at all times during the day so they don't have to move much (Note: the harness is also a red flag for kitschy as well...and it's still a bad idea.)

They shoot only the essentials and could not care less if an amazing moment passed them by without a flinch.

They're not complete idiots, though. If a missed moment is large enough, they might say, "Hey, can you do that again so I can get a photo of it."

Nothing brings back memories like photographs, and again, I can picture a couple looking back at their wedding photos and saying, "Remember when that moment REALLY happened…and then the photographer asked us to do it again for the photo? Ah, good times!”

The Cool Photographer is different. This photographer cares about this day. They are honored to be there, and even when their personal life may get in the way, or they aren't "feeling it" on the couple’s day, they never let it show.

They’re nimble and polite. They’re good photographers who care about their craft and know the importance of the day. They work together with their couple to get the amazing shots for their couple, and they don’t waste time doing it.

This is your couple’s day, not yours and respecting this simple but powerful fact is the mark of a professional. This is a good attitude to adopt.

INSIDE WEDDING PHOTOGRAPHY was started exactly for this reason, and this is what I want to try to guide you towards - being cool and professional.

You don't have to wear a bespoke Brioni suit with a Bulgari watch to be cool. You don’t have to have an entourage of assistants, and you don’t have to have four camera bags filled with the latest gear.

You just have to be kind, gracious, empathetic, helpful and show a little artistic flare with a smile…and back that attitude up with solid camera chops.

You get the opportunity to photograph a real wedding for a real couple and deliver to them a portfolio of images that will bring their day back...the moment they look at them.

It does not matter if it's been 15 days or 15 years. Your photos are that powerful, and your attitude will come through in your photos.

It's not hard to be The Cool Wedding Photographer.

View this day, the people and the moments that happen through the eyes of the bride, and you'll be just fine.

And please, (PLEASE) leave the Kevlar utility vest at home! You're shooting a wedding, not busting up the local speakeasy.

Have fun and be cool!